My journey with IBS - review on TCM

Hello! Today I'm gonna talk about my (unfortunate) journey with IBS which is also known as Irritable Bowel syndrome. 

I remember I used to have an iron stomach - i.e. i could have eaten 3 bowls of rice + other dishes without issues and within a few hours, i'm ready for my next hunt. However, ever since a severe food poisoning episode when I was in Sec 2, my stomach was never the same again. 

Initially after the food poisoning episode, I noticed that i started having on and off periods of constipation and diarrhea. Increasingly, I developed flatulence which often resulted in embarrassing tummy sounds and sulphur packed fart... I really had no idea what was happening then and I could only attribute to my body 'recovering' from the bad food poisoning which lasted for about 2 weeks. 

Before I knew it, I've been living with such uncomfortable condition for at least 10 years. I did try to see a doctor before but I'm often told that it's either I'm stressed, not eating enough fiber, not exercising enough etc etc. But mind you... i do all these yet my condition seemed to have worsened over the years. TBH, I was at wits end because I've tried omeprazole, enzymes, constipation relief pills etc but nothing seemed to help. If it did, it is only temporary and the symptoms would be back with a vengeance lol. I did a lot of research on pubmed, google, youtube whatever and my symptoms seemed to point towards IBS. Although I did not get myself medically diagnosed as having IBS, I knew something wasn't right with me. 

Thus, I decided to try out TCM to see if I could regulate my body back to the norm? I know it definitely does not sound scientific in any way and as a science student and it was rather difficult for me to accept. However, when nothing seemed to work, any solution to me could be a possible light at the end of the tunnel. 

I've visited at least 2-3 other TCMs and each visit would cost me around $80 or more... while symptoms did improve, it didn't last. My only source of 'hope' seemed to be diminishing and I wanted to give up trying tcm. HOWEVER, my ibs problem was soooooo bad after university that whatever I ingest, my stomach bloats up like i'm 9 months pregnant and gosh it was really frustrating. I felt that if I did not find a way to relieve this problem, it's gonna affect my health or my mental health... 

Chia Kit Chay Medical Hall TCM

SO anyways I googled for good TCM around where I stay in 2019 and a blogpost regarding Chia Kit Chay Medical Hall popped up (The blog is no longer available). The blogger talked about how the physician managed to help her conceive despite after undergoing multiple failed attempts of IVF etc. OK, pregnancy and IBS has no relations but heck it, if he can help someone get pregnant even when IVF cannot, I gotta try this!!!

I went with negative expectations due to my previous failed attempts and I told myself that I will just give up if this wasn't gonna work through after 3 months of treatment. The first consultation was rather efficient and doc told my that I have IBS too (yay i'm not a paranoid and crazy patient). He suggested me to go down every week and I had to receive acupuncture + medication as well. He told me that I'm experiencing all these because I have a weak spleen (in the tcm concept) and thus he would have to strengthen my spleen. TBH, it's hard for my brain to wrap around this because I'm too used to western medicine but hey, if tcm has lasted throughout 5000 years of china history, it probably works. 

Did it work??

Lo and behold! After 6 months or so of treatment, my condition kinda stabilised and I no longer have frequent cycles of constipation and diarrhoea. I could also enjoy my food much better now without bloating up like I'm pregnant. Apart from that, my energy levels has improved greatly and I no longer feel so lethargic despite having a full 8 hours of sleep. Seriously thank god for sending this amazing doc and I really really cannot imagine myself struggling with this problem for the rest of my life!! Quality of life has drastically improved for me after my IBS has stabilised and I could feel that I am less irritable as a person as well. 

I went religiously every week from Nov 2019 until dengue strike in April 2020 and I was forced to take a hiatus of about 1 month. That's when I realised that my body was no longer 100% dependent on his medication/treatment for me to feel ok. This translate to the fact that my condition has improved! I still visit him now and then for other stuff and also to keep this problem at bay - but it's at most twice a month now :) 

About the physician

I found Physician Chia very frank but friendly. Instead of just treating my IBS problem, he treated me as a whole which I found different compared to other TCM I've visited. He shows genuine care to his patients and it was almost like meeting an old friend everytime i go for review haha. Whenever he finds patients in bad mood, he will often try to counsel them and advice them to look on the brighter side of things. I think this is something I really appreciate because after going for his treatment and AKA counselling sessions, his snippets of wisdom on life has rubbed off me a little. So if you are looking for a caring and zai physician, look no further! 

Cost 

The cost is definitely not cheap considering that I had to go down every single week. Each session was about $78 and it was a serious pinch to my wallet. However, as the saying goes that health is wealth, I'm actually very glad that at this point of time, my wealth is still able to buy me back my health and a peaceful stomach. With a fixed cost of $312 for TCM, I certainly had to cut down on other areas of my expenses to tide through. BUT IT IS WORTH IT!

IBS and ME now 

I guess IBS will always have a symbiotic relationship with me whether I like it or not. But at least it is a tamed kitty now. Although I do have some occasions where there is severe flatulence, the issue isn't as serious as before and I can live with this minor inconvenience. Living with a chronic condition isn't easy and it takes a lot of self motivation to overcome the pain and frustration. It is about learning how to cope with the problem mentally and also physically. To me, that would be to understand what are my triggers and how I could possible tweak my lifestyle to better manage the disease. 

I still experience basal bloating after I eat now, but at least it is manageable. I remember the bloating used to be so bad everyday that I could only wear loose preggy looking clothes because I did not want anyone else to notice my enlarged tummy. Fortunately now, I could at least wear some figure hugging clothes on good days :) 

What worked for me 

Stress was a major factor that contributed to the severity of my symptoms. Thus, I knew I had to regulate my stress levels. This included regular exercise (cardio, hiit, weights, yoga etc), journalling and deep breathing exercises. Not only did it help with my bloating, it improved my sleep and energy level as well. 

I began a log book on what triggers worsening of my bloating/diarrhoea/constipation and try to reduce the intake of these food. I tried my best to go on a low FODMAP food. While complete abstinence could be a solution, the physician also felt that maintaining a good quality of life is still important :) thank goodness I do not have to bid farewell to ice cream, desserts and spicy food :> Portion control is also important because overeating will certainly cause bloating even in normal people. I've noticed that banana and kiwi are especially effective for me to have normal bowel habits in the morning and thus have included them into my regular meals :) I'll share more in another post on specific changes I've made to my lifestyle. 

If you are struggling with IBS and would like to try TCM, you could try Mr Chia out! However, do note that he does not take appointments and every visit is strictly by walk ins only. Try to be early as he is very popular - the queue tends to balloon up within 30 minutes of opening. He is located near the selegie soyabean and diagonally opposite the famous Ponggol Nasi Lemak. The nearest MRT station is Kovan MRT and there are several buses that service that area also. I've included the address below, you can google to find out about his opening hours. Closed on Wednesdays and Public holidays. 

Chia Kit Chay Medical Hall: 1010-A Upper Serangoon Rd, Singapore 534748

5 things I will stop buying in 2021

It has almost been 2 weeks since 2021 started and I guess many people has thrown in some new year resolution into their routine as well! As for me, I think goals have to be specific in order for me to follow them and here are the 5 things that I think I should stop buying in 2021 :)

1. Cosmetics 

To begin with, I don't think I own that many cosmetics. Currently, I only own the Laneige cushion, colourpop eyeliner, some make up brushes, colour palette and eye shadow palette. Sadly, I've come to a conclusion that I really will not wear make up on a daily basis and there is no point for me to buy an array of cosmetics... it wouldn't really change my innate laziness to put on some makeup before I leave the house haha. Therefore, in other not to waste the existing make up, I've decided to try my best to finish them up and not add anything to the current collection. I am 100% sure that these products would either turn mouldy or expire way before I manage to finish them. 

Ever since COVID started and mask wearing has become mandatory, I've only put on my BB cushion ONCE(?!) and I still didn't like the feeling of having my make up rubbed off onto my mask. So really kudos to those warriors out there who doll themselves up nicely before they leave the house each day. I.really.cant. and I am just plain lazy >:

2. Beauty products 

I used to have this obsession with J-beauty, k-beauty and whatever beauty products that the market throws at me. I was a staunch believer of whatever routines that were thrown at me because I thought it could get my skin to be clearer and brighter. Hence, my beauty products included facial toner, essence, serum, eye cream, face cream, spot reducing cream, sleeping cream and sunblock (in the day). However, some way along last year, I've noticed that instead of getting clearer skin, it seemed that my skin had little bumps growing on it (yikes!) and perhaps it was getting saturated from the amount of stuff I slather onto my skin. 

I'm not denying the benefits of the different products but somehow I felt that my skin became better as I began to cut down on the number of products I use. Currently, I am only using toner, face cream +/- sunblock and occasionally some face mask. While I still have 3 different toners and 2 different face cream, I am trying to finish the bottles and focus on maximum 2 products each line in future. 

Cutting down on the steps of my skin care frees up time as well as mental space, which can be used to focus on more important or meaningful things (like blogging!). There is also less FOMO-ness as I used to catch up on what is the latest beauty trend. Life seems much simpler right now and I think my skin is loving it :) 

3. Fast fashion

As you all know, I cleared out almost 3-4 bags of my old clothes previously and many of them belonged to the fast fashion category. 

I used to LOVE going to Bugis street or buying from those $10-20 dollars clothing stores. These clothes are often in fashion and the price tag doesn't cause a huge damage to my wallet. However, what I failed to realise about fast fashion is that - they come and go. The materials used are often not of top quality, which is justified by the price tag, and cannot be worn over a long periods of time. This creates financial and environmental wastage. 

By avoiding fast fashion, I can channel my resources into better use: buy better quality clothes which can be worn multiple times and on different occasions :)

4. Shoes 

I could be a caterpillar in my previous life, I do not know... I still have 2 pairs of pazzion shoes in my room unworn since 2019 because the current pairs of shoes I have are still serving me relatively well. Oh, this brings me to another point that when buying shoes, one should also try to buy good quality shoes. While the pazzion shoes are darn expensive (~$80-90) per pair on average, I'm quite confident that I would be able to wear them for at least 2-3 years before needing a new pair. This is compared to my $15-$30 dollars pasat/taobao/ezbuy shoes which would often fall apart/delaminate after wearing <1 year or worse still <6 months after being insulted by rain :(

Similarly, I also have a pair of Onisuka tiger shoes that I've been wearing for 2 years plus now and it's still serving me really well. Although it has began to show signs of fatigue like holes at the back of the shoes, I must say that it has been a faithful servant haha. 

If you guys are looking for reliable working shoes, I highly recommend Pazzion! While they are expensive, their shoes have been one of the most comfortable shoes I've worn and my feet are blessed to have found them. Taking $90 as the cost price and if you are able to wear them for at least 3 years, it would be priced at $30 per year! Definitely a steal! 

When they say 一分钱一分货，it's really true!

5. Bags 

Writing this post really reminds me of my shopaholic tendencies when I was younger. I remember rather vividly how I really wanted to buy a few bags such as the rattan bags that was highly raved a few years back, and my soul was not calmed till I got my hands on it. However, shortly after getting it, the excitement worn off and now the poor bag is just sitting inside my cupboard. When my desires are controlled by materials, it is difficult to stay contented because there will always be more things that I can want. 

Moving on, I would continue to make use of the bags that I currently own and try not to add any additional ones into my stash unless I manage to give away/sell the ones that I already have. Even so, the bag should be functional, multi-purpose and versatile. This reduces the need for different types of bag and reduces clutter in my house. Again, I am also trying to move away from buying cheap and poor quality bags because they really do not last. My friend's bugis bag lasted for a week(?) while mine lasted for max 5 wears. 

I often overvalue how much an item could bring happiness to me. However, in reality these things will never confer the kind of lasting joy my soul longs for. We are but just nomads in this life and I am trying to remind myself to live light and enjoy the sceneries instead. I hope to adjust my life so that it is less cluttered and my mind would be freer to pursue what really satisfies. 

So here are the 5 things I would (*hopefully*) stop buying in 2021. What are some of yours? 

Disney Pixar Soul

年初一，我和男友偶然在电影院的网站上收讯都此动画电影。这是一部关于‘灵魂’的一部电影。看了看网民的评论还蛮不错的，就决定去看一看。 

在新的一年观看了这类型的电影，颇有有感概。

这是一部关于人生，死亡和人生目标的一部电影。电影中的男主角就在当他在终于得到梦寐以求的表演机会时，发生了一场意外，命悬旦夕。就在这时，他的灵魂被送往人死后的世界，和其他灵魂排队等着超生。但是，他很明确的意识到：他的生命不应该在这一天结束。而且不能够在他还未上台表演之前结束。因为这是他毕生愿望，若无法达成他是不会善罢甘休的。可惜的是，经过他费劲脑汁的一番苦心，他的灵魂阴差阳错的落入一直猫的身上，而另外一个从未出生的灵魂‘22’则落入男主角的身体里。具体的故事你们就看一下电影吧。接下来分享的是我的感悟：）

1. 追求的目标不能是我们人生的全部

很多时候，我们总会把我们的目标变成我们人生的全部。比如说，我们为了在事业上干一份成就，成天废寝忘食，忽略了家人朋友和自己。电影的主角便是这样：为了能够获取上爵士舞台表演，他仿佛满脑子只有爵士。任何事物都入不了他的眼。即便去剪头发时，也只有和发型师了爵士的话题，根本没有注意到可能发型师也有自己想要分享的话题。在男主角的世界里，仿佛只有爵士才能让他生活。但是，很纳闷的是：当男主角成功的登上舞台的时候，他发现自己好想没有想象中的那般喜悦。反而，他自问：“接下来该怎么办？”。朋友回答说：“就这样，每晚回来同样的舞台表演吧。” 这时的他，感觉现实好像没有和梦想对称。。。

人生确实需要目标。倘若没有目标，我们便会和剧中的“22”一样飘荡着。相反的，倘若我们的目标使我们沦陷于不可自拔的世界中，我们也同时失去人生。所以，我从这部电影学到的是凡事都的讲究平衡。不要义无反顾的狂追目标。目标可以是人生的一部分，但万万不能成为人生的全部。记得放慢脚步吧。因为每一个我们能够实现的梦想往往都不会和曾经想象中的甜蜜。刚刚得逞的愿望的喜悦也是会被时光冲洗掉的。

2. 记得在人生的旅途中欣赏风景

看，男主角突然间就挂了。人生中有谁能够精准的预言自己的死亡时期呢？我们岂不是都能在任何时间地点面对死亡吗？下一秒，心脏可能就停了。明天可能被诊断癌症。明年可能就是最后一年了？在面对死亡的时候，我们难道会遗憾没有挣多一点钱，多做一点工作；还是我们会遗憾没有抽多一点时间陪伴家人朋友，抽空去看一看最像看的风景吗？

人生短暂，世事无常。这部电影提醒了我要热爱生活和珍惜身边的人。其实所谓的人生就是我们学会生活的开始。散步的时候闻一下花草树木的芬芳；喝茶的时候慢慢的品尝它独特的味道和温度；当风很雨迎面而来时，试着享受着它们的触摸。这或许就是我们所追求的简单但幸福的感觉吧？

3. 没有一个人生出来就有附来使命

这个对我来说是蛮深刻的。为什么呢？从小到大，我一直在寻找我的使命：早期，我以为是在学校考到好成绩，然后找到一份称心的工作。工作便是我的使命吧？可是当考上梦寐以求的学校和开始了那工作以后，真的没有想象中的那样快乐和兴奋。渐渐的，生活的点点滴滴也成功的融化掉那好成绩或好工作的荣耀感。这感觉顿时让我慌了。那么我的我来到这个世界的目的到底是什么？这种在黑暗中摸索的滋味，让我的心掏空，也有点措手无策。

其实没有一个人生出来就有附来使命。人生是一个旅程而不是重点。不要一味的追求什么人生宗旨和使命，而好好的体验人生的每一个阶段。把生活活得最干脆，最开心就好。或许人生便是这样的一般，就算我们争取多少金银珠宝我们的心也总会有一部分不完美。与其想尽办法想把那一块缺陷给填补，以为那便是我们毕生所追求的 ‘使命’，不如把心静下来而好好的体会生活吧。不要为了那 ‘使命’ 而折腾自己。或许我们的使命便是活在当下，活出最灿烂和真是的自己。或许我们对生活的态度从容了，‘使命’ 便会登上门了？

希望我们在新的一年能够认真面对自己·我们是不是把心灵的需求给忽略了？希望我们大家为蒙蔽的心灵洗涤，开始生活吧☺

Things I would do differently in 2021

 Looking forward into the new year, there are things which I hope I can improve on and things which I would do differently. 

Spiritual 

It is my prayer that God would help me to be more desperate for Him. Make my desire, passion and purpose be Christ and not of the world. Purify my intentions and make them pure so that they will be pleasing aroma to you. I pray that I will be aided in my spiritual disciplines because what a great sinner and wanderer I am. While I'll definitely not drift into holiness, I pray that I will be pulled back by your grace should I drift away from your holiness. 

Thankful for my friend who have gifted me the one year bible and the study book ~ been always wanting to help my lazy and undisciplined self to finish reading the bible in one year. Praying that I will be more intentional in spending quiet time and meditating on His words and not just rushing through it like it's part of my checklist. 

More of you and less of me in the year 2021 :)

Self 

I hope I can learn to be kinder to myself by not entertaining self depleting comments whenever something goes wrong. It takes patience and grace with myself to forgive my own mistakes and accept that I can never be perfect. And that's really okay. 

Being less judgemental and critical of others. We are all only human and none of us can declare that we are infallible. Who am I then to sit on my high horse to condemn others of their mistakes when I make mistakes as well? Perhaps part of growing up also means learning to accept people for who they are and not to be too quick to jump to a judgement. 

Work 

I guess as we start to get use to work and are settled down, we can become bored of the mundane and repetitive things. But yes I am really thankful that I still have a job despite the terrible economic outlook from Covid-19. 

Something I would like to do differently would be grumble less and to do things to the best of my ability. Grumbling seems to decrease my willingness to serve and do my best. And I hope that I would go through this year with Colossians 3:23 in mind that whatever my hands find to do, do it heartily, as to the Lord , and not unto men. 

While God has not promised a smooth sailing life for us after becoming Christians, we are promised to have our rewards in heaven. Man may not see our hard work or may even be scornful towards us despite our purest intentions. However, I pray that I will commit my work unto His hands and let my soul find rest in Him. 

Mindset 

Going forward, I hope to develop a growth mindset where I shall regard every challenge or difficulty as an opportunity for growth and development. This would also translate to less grumbling in the year ahead and to be more at peace even if the situation does not seem to go my way. While I seek to improve in different aspects of my life, I also want to learn how to be more content with what I am blessed with. Contentment probably wouldn't fall into my lap easily and it is much easier for me to see what I am lacking compared to what I am blessed with. Hence, I hope to be intentional about this and to find something I am thankful for and give thanks for it everyday. 

In the new year, I hope to slowly lay aside the heart of comparison and envy. While I think certain amount of comparison is necessary to see what I may improve on, excessive comparison is unhealthy and would plunge me into a state of despair. This includes active comparison on my side where I compare myself with others and also passive comparison whereby people compare themselves to me. Laying aside the weight of comparison would liberate myself from the state of insufficiency and I would not have to live life through perpetual anxiety. Everyone is different and everyone has their own unique set of challenges and struggles. What they present on social media are curated truths and one will never be able to know what's going on exactly in their lives. Therefore, it is futile to look at that facade and conclude that my life is less worthy or less happening compared to theirs and feel unhappy. I am enough. God is enough and has provided me whatever I already need. It is always easier to see what I am lacking and feel uneasy instead of being thankful of what I already have because I am often so ungrateful! Moving forward, I hope to cultivate a thankful and contented heart :) 

The next thing I would like to change would be the mindset of penny wise, pound foolish. I'm really guilty of this because I love to purchase cheap and affordable things, fooling myself into thinking that I've gotten a real bargain when in actual fact, would pay to spend more thereafter. What do I mean by this? I've realised that buying cheap and poor quality products may save me some costs initially but these things tend to need more replacements often and the total cost may end up more than just getting one pricier but better quality product. Examples would be buying fast fashion on ezbuy, cotton on, bugis etc. While the prices are attractive, the material tends to fray easily and sadly, cheap products will tend to look cheap. I'm not saying that it's impossible to buy good deals and good products if the price is cheap, but i think the chances are slimmer from my own experience. I hope to take this new mindset to my house renovation and try not to just go for the cheapest materials possible because I do not want things to break down almost immediately after I start to stay on lol. 

Finally, as an extension of learning to be more contented with what I already have, I want to start adopting the mindset of having less is more. Instead of having additions to my existing life, I would want to subtract things from my life. This helps me focus on things that I absolutely need and not entrench myself in a cycle of want. When my wants get lesser, I am able to focus more on my needs. This helps me to generate less wastage and be a more mindful consumer and better steward of my resources. 

So that's all for now, wishing everyone a happy 2021 ahead :)